Andrew’s Journal

Family and Holidays have become more problematic over time. Divorce, death, aging, and distance seem to have taken a toll on the once ideal vision I had of a close family. While I still love my brother and sister, and would do anything within my power to help them, we are not close anymore. The daily exchanges of thoughts, sharing of meals, living under one roof, and laughing and playing have been gone for decades. It has eroded to occasional phone calls and obligatory gatherings for Holidays.

No one is to be blamed for the situation, or if there is, it must be spread equally among my siblings and me. My mother has tried her best to prevent it and she makes regular calls and visits to each of us, but father has been dead for a few years, divorce has changed the players, and increased the number of obligations. Combine those things with three siblings that are each very different, and each focused in disparate career and personal goals, and a two hour drive between us and the result is something less than I had expected as a child.

While the situation causes some sorrow from time-to-time. It is not one I am going to change. I am probably making the situation worse because I don’t want to attend the obligatory gatherings anymore. I just find it too empty. I’d rather just have a coversation with my brother and sister over a sandwich and soda, and I may try to do that instead of attending the Holiday rituals. Honestly I think I enjoy spending the Holidays with friends, relaxing, and going to movies and museums more.